We’ve all heard that before, right? “Health is a journey, not a destination.” It’s a cliche because it’s true.
I remember when it first “clicked” to me that I was ready to change my lifestyle, to lose weight, and feel better. I was 22 years old, freshly married, and really unhappy with how adulthood was panning out for me. Go to work, come home, sit and watch TV, eat a box of mac ‘n cheese, make a box of brownies, pour a rum ‘n coke. Sit. Sleep. Wake. Repeat.
UGH. Blaaaaah! That kind of life was NOT leading to a healthy or happy person at all. So something shifted inside and I had this ‘ah-ha’ realization that I could redirect myself any time I damn well pleased.
And I was ready to do it, please and thank you.
As a naturally reward-centered and goal-oriented person, I set my first goal: to lose weight. I understand that weight-loss is NOT always an indication of health or wellness, or even positive changes for people. Oftentimes, weight loss is a scapegoat for some other deep seeded issues that people fixate on, and weight can be the ultimate blame or the ultimate “game” to focus on instead of whatever is really at the crux. But it was a natural first place for me to start, having never thought much about my weight before then (at least not obsessed over it).
I was never an athlete growing up. I hated sports, hated games, and didn’t like being last and losing everything I attempted. (I had a few demoralizing years of attempting soccer, tennis, and track… nope nope nope.) So for me, getting started with anything fitness-wise was a first-ever attempt as an adult.
Working in a weight-loss clinic now, and having many years of health coaching experience under my belt, I can see how people wind up in the ‘yo-yo’ mentality with their weight. (See: scapegoat or distraction, above.) The real clincher I’ve found to be true in working with clients who are successful in losing weight and keeping it off is that there is a perceptible shift in how they think about their lives and themselves.
That happened for me – a life changing shift. It became not IF I lose the weight, but WHEN I lose the weight. (Again – “the weight” isn’t actually necessarily the problem here – but it was a tangible and measurable benchmark for me to start with in leading to a whole new lifestyle.)
The difference in thinking “If” versus “when” literally changed the direction of my life.
In my 20’s, I went through many phases in this journey. The first phase was weight-loss, and then it was active maintenance and calorie tracking. Then I shifted to intuitive eating, and started my journey to becoming a health coach. I tried the runner phase (I still run, but it’s not my sole identity), signing up for races, trying to better my distance and pace. I tried a yogi-phase (still love it, but am out of practice), and consistently did hot yoga and vinyasa, wore my mala beads and hippy-style clothes. I tried the body-building phase (which I’m still actively lifting now, but with a different approach), doing meaty meal-prep and steamed broccoli and egg whites…. Then I moved into the vegetarian>vegan phase… and then almost five years ago, I became a mom and had to readjust everything again.
Throughout all these stages, I was constantly looking for my next focus. Weight Loss. Maintenance. Health. Fitness. Motherhood.
So what’s next? I’m already healthy. (check) I’m already pretty fit. (check) I’m already plant-based. (check) I’m an active mom, I work doing the things I love, married to a man I love. (check) I’m literally happier than I’ve ever been before. (I can’t believe how lucky I feel!)
You may be wondering why bother with a “next,” why not just stay right where you are?
Because where I am is organic, ever changing, ever shifting and running through my fingers like an active stream.
It’s not a destination. It’s a journey.
It struck me that the next phase of my journey that feels right is a focus on improving my athleticism.
For years, I’ve gone in phases of being more or less obsessive about exactly the number on the scale (for reference: I’m about 15 pounds heavier than my lowest weight, 10 years ago). But I’m seeing now that in my current life, this number has no place of health or wellness for me. I’ve already established habits that keep me healthy, so my weight is not a reflection of my health. I’m already very active, so it’s not a reflection of my lack of activity. My weight is simply my relationship with gravity.
So it’s time to find a new focus. And I like the idea of being an athlete, growing into the “gains” I can make – the feats I can accomplish in this blessed strong body, versus how many pounds I can force it to shed.
As a person who has never considered herself an athlete before, I’m ready to become one. I will never be an olympian or a professional anything. But I WILL be a badass 30-something mom who can squat and lift and sprint and curl.
And you know what? You can decide to be whomever you want to be, whenever you want to.
It’s never too late to be whomever you want to be.
Join your journey, just as you are.