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First Video Blog (Vlog) – Health Coaching Principles

 

Greetings, friends!

Today, I got a wild hair and decided to try something new (well, newish for me): a video blog! I used to post an occasional vlog on SparkPeople when I was blogging regularly there, and would now like to get back in a routine of doing vlogs and blogs here on my own website. Sometimes it’s just better to hear things face-to-face, ya know?

My hope with these vlogs is to help generate conversation, and give you an opportunity to ask questions and possibly get them answered by me! I work on lots of different concepts with my clients, and would love to give you a little glimpse of what it would be like to work with me as a client.

In today’s vlog, I talk about my guiding principles in health coaching — the basic philosophies I have while working with clients toward healthy lifestyle changes. I hope you find it interesting, and that it gives you a better insight into what health coaching entails.

I would love to hear your thoughts, feedback, and questions in my comments below! Do you agree with my principles? 

What would you like me to talk about next week? Any burning questions you’d like me to share my thoughts on? Ask away, and I’ll choose one to answer in my next vlog!

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Healthy Homemade Snickers Bars

 

If you’re not already allured by this blog post title, let me get you just a bit more interested with a [mediocre, but still] tantalizing photo…

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Ooooooohhhhh yeeaaaaahhhhhh!

Since making the switch to a vegan lifestyle, I have become even more aware of the ingredient labels on any packaged foods I buy. (I don’t buy many, or very often, but when I do, rest assured I’ve read the label.) To my dismay, most of my favorite chocolate candy bars and treats I would rarely indulge in contain dairy, so they are no longer appealing to me in the same way they once were. 

But the good news is that it’s got me feeling creative when it comes to making healthier and even more delicious versions of my treats at home! Nice!

Last night, craving inspiration struck when I was wanting a creamy and gooey sweet treat, and really longing for a Snickers bar. So, drawing upon some of the recipes I’ve tried before (like Angela Liddon’s healthier Twix Bars – you must make these, too!), I concocted my own sweet treat in the matter of 10 minutes. 

Yep, 10 MINUTES! That’s how quickly you can get these made (well… plus the freeze time, but that’s just agonizing wait time, not active). 

These healthified candy bars will conquer any sweet craving you have! But I warn you… it’s also hard not to eat the whole (small) pan at once. ;)

[yumprint-recipe id=’2′]I hope you try these bars and enjoy them! I’d love to hear if you do, especially if you have a major sweet tooth like me and really value a good chocolate treat now and then (*ahem* daily). 

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Favorite Fridge Foods: Staples for My Healthy Kitchen

 

A couple days ago, I posted a question on facebook about what you might like to read on this blog. Many of you seemed interested in reading about my favorite foods and kitchen staples, and since a kitchen and pantry stocked with healthy items is key to living and eating well, I thought it would be a good topic to cover.

When working with clients on healthy changes in their nutrition habits, I am often surprised (even though I shouldn’t be) by what foods people have not tried and do not use on a daily basis — foods that I consider pretty “common” in my life, and that I utilize all the time. It is easy to forget that only a few short years ago, this “normal” of mine was completely different, and I would have written a staples list that looked something like this: pasta, cereal, bread, cow’s milk, Chef Boyardee, Kraft Mac N Cheese boxes, hamburger, chicken breasts, creamed soups, cheetos, lunch meat, cheese, and a family size gallon of ice cream (chocolate chip). 

YIKES!

While I do still admittedly stock pastas, some cereal (mainly for my husband, the Cereal Eater), and sometimes bread (fresh baked whole grain, or Ezekiel – frozen), the rest of my list has changed dramatically over the past few years. I rarely shop in the middle of the grocery store, and when I do, it’s generally for something which I can’t find an organic or health-market version. 

When I’m introducing new clients to healthy foods, or walking them through a pantry raid (buh-bye Cheez-Its!) or a grocery shopping tour, I will often give them a list of my pantry and kitchen staples. This list is categorized by type and section of my kitchen (pantry, baking goods, vegetables, condiments, etc), and covers pretty much everything I could think of that I routinely stock. 

Since I don’t want to lose your attention, I’m going to break down just a FEW of my staples into a couple blogs to give you an idea of the kinds of things I routinely turn to in my cooking and eating on a regular basis! This blog will cover a few favorite items from my fridge (fruits, veggies, etc). Please excuse my first item from qualifying in the “fridge” list, but it couples well with the fruits/veggies. ;-)

Favorite Fridge Foods

Bananas

Okay, so I don’t store bananas in my FRIDGE, but I figured I’d include them with other fruits and veggies I always keep on hand in this list. I always have bananas in my kitchen. I will often intentionally buy the brown/spotted ones, or wait until they get really ripe at home, then peel and break them in half to store in a bag in my freezer. Always always always have frozen bananas. It’s great for emergency “banana ice cream,” adding great texture and natural sweetness to smoothies, and coining and dipping in chocolate shell (mmmm). For a fun snack idea, slice a fresh banana lengthwise  and spread with almond or peanut butter and a few chocolate chips. Banana split!

apples_orangesApples & Oranges

Pretty standard fruits, but I always have them as well. They’re easy grab-n-go snacks, and have a long life in the fridge! I use oranges a lot in my juices, and love apple slices sprinkled with cinnamon and dipped in peanut or almond butter for a snack. Peel and chop up an orange and throw it in a raw kale salad for a delightful citrus flavor with a strong green.

Kale

Kale is my all-time favorite green vegetable! I almost always have kale on hand… and if I don’t, it’s because I’ve just eaten it all up and need to buy some soon! I put kale in everything from smoothies, raw salads, on top of pizza, stuffed in wraps, thrown in stir fries, torn into soups, and as a big steamed or sautéed pile on my plate. Kale chips are also a favorite snack of mine!

Spinach & Romaine

Spinach_SaladThese are pretty standard greens in my fridge. Believe it or not, I don’t use them primarily for salads (although yes, I do make delicious salads with them, too – like the one in this picture)! Primarily, I use both these greens in smoothies and juicing (spinach more for smoothies, romaine for juices). They’re so light and fresh and leave me feeling fan-freaking-tastic every time.

 

Unsweetened Original Almond Milk

This is my go-to milk. I use it in everything! Smoothies, gravies, baked goods, shakes, dressings, soups, and just as a cold glass with a cookie! I love how creamy almond milk is as compared to other milks, and the store-brand (HyVee) around here is only $2.49/half gallon. Compare that to $4.99/half gallon for “good quality” (organic, hormone-free, “grass fed”) cow’s milk, and it’s a considerable savings. Sometimes, I freeze almond milk in ice cube trays and then use for blending up deliciously thick and creamy shakes – combine with some silken tofu and you have a thick “Frosty” treat.

almond_milkI have tried other nondairy milks — like soy, rice, hemp, coconut “beverage”, and oat  — and like the texture and taste of almond best. Soy has a slightly sweet flavor (even unsweetened), and should be used moderately, rice milk is kind of watery but has a mild taste, hemp milk is thick and creamy but very expensive, coconut milk “beverage” (the kind in the carton) is very coconutty and thinner than almond milk, and oat definitely has a strong OAT taste, which may not be great in all dishes. Almond wins my vote. :)

Natural Peanut Butter & Almond Butter

I use nut butters in smoothies, on whole grain toast, swirled into oatmeal, in baked goods, blended into dressings/sauces, as a dip for fruits and veggies (apples, carrots, and celery are common for me), and of course by the spoonful. If you’ve never tried almond butter, you seriously need to go buy some (or make some) immediately. Seriously. Go. Now. ;) 

Nuts & Seeds (stored in the freezer)

Nuts_seedsKeep raw nuts and seeds fresh by storing in the fridge or freezer — the Omega fatty acids in nuts go rancid on the shelf after a few months, so its important to keep them cold in airtight containers and they will last for upwards of a few years! I always have these raw nuts and seeds on hand for baking, cooking, and snacking: walnuts, almonds, pecans, cashews, brazil nuts, sunflower seeds, pumpkin seeds, flaxseed, hemp seeds, and sesame seeds. When I first starting cooking and baking more plant-based, I didn’t have this variety in my kitchen all the time! So, it seemed like an uncomfortable (and expensive) shift to start stocking these regularly. However, now that they are “staples” in my kitchen, I use them often and buy intermittently, so the price doesn’t seem as shocking all at once. 

 

I know it can seem overwhelming trying to transition to a healthy kitchen and pantry all at once, so make changes as you can, with foods that you enjoy. Try new recipes each week that may utilize foods or ingredients you don’t typically stock, and then set a challenge to use those unfamiliar foods or ingredients in another way later on that week or next! These items would not have become staples in my life if I only depended on them for the occasional recipe that calls for it. Familiarize yourself with fresh foods, and get creative. 

After all, if you have healthy foods on hand (and DON’T have the crap food — like Cheetos or cream-of-mystery-stuff soups) then you won’t turn to the old patterns for comfort and ease. You’ll have to eat the good stuff, or it goes to waste (which really pisses me off when I waste food, so it’s a good motivator to eat it!). 

Watch and subscribe for my next post which will continue the theme of this one — Favorite Pantry Foods! You’ll get some insight into the things I regularly keep on hand to throw together healthful meals and snacks on a regular basis.

What are you favorite fridge foods? Do you share any of mine? Share your thoughts below!

 

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Easy Orzo Salad

 I love orzo. I love it’s strange texture – a cross between pasta and rice – and that it’s such a quick, easy dish to cook up.

At Pomegranate Market, there is an orzo salad that I’ve tried and enjoy, but there are a few downsides to it: 1) it is loaded with black olives, and I’m just not a fan; 2) it uses white orzo (refined grain). So last night for a quick dinner, I wanted to experiment with a dish that could be eaten warm from the pan, or cold as a summer salad. You can experiment with this idea and use any vegetables you have on hand or enjoy. You can also skip the water sauté and simply add all the veggies raw for more crunch (massage the kale first and let it soften with a little oil), or cook all the veggies instead. I am sure halved cherry tomatoes would be lovely in this salad, too. Make it more substantial by adding a cup or two of beans (white beans, yum!) or by crumbling in fried tempeh.

I’m a big fan of flexible cooking. Have fun with your meals, mix it up, and enjoy!

[yumprint-recipe id=’1′]

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My Journey to Compassionate Living: A Tribute to Animals

PLEASE NOTE: This blog/essay is a therapeutic reflection on the soulful and mindful changes I’ve experienced over the past year and a half. It is not meant to be offensive or preachy, not intended to spark anger or arguments, but rather meant to express the questions and realizations I’ve been dealing with in a level, articulate way. Writing is soothing for me, and I’ve been longing to get these thoughts down for some time now. If you feel you will be angered or offended by my discussion of my choice to go vegan, please abstain from reading. This is not a discussion of what it means for YOU, but rather a reflection of what living compassionately means for ME. What it means for me cannot be argued. If you’d like to come with me to journey through the questions I’ve asked myself, and are open to asking questions of yourself, please read on. I’m happy to participate in a non-judgmental, open and honest discussion if anyone wishes to ask questions. I do not wish to start a war or argument. Thank you for being respectful!

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Every morning, I wake up to the few soft mews of my giant, fluffy and handsome cat Oliver, coaxing me awake. He paws over the terrain of blankets and pillows to position himself on my chest (sometimes my head) and promptly begin a rumbling purr.  Kneading his big soft paws into my throat, I have no choice but to acknowledge him, greet the day and spend several minutes lovingly stroking his silky coat.

Once out of bed, my cottony and gorgeous cat Nina heralds me that it’s time to be fed. She dances around lightly on her white paws, and won’t let me love her up until duties have been taken care of. Her loud meow and sassy swishing of her tail let me know that her needs must be met promptly. She is a queenly and demanding girl.

Slippers on, jacket zipped over pajamas, I return to the bedroom to greet my anxious puppy in her kennel at the foot of my bed. She’s been waiting patiently for me to return and let her out to start the day. Upon my greeting her, Elenore begins wagging her tail rapidly and wiggling around, pawing at the crate door. I sit on the floor and let her out, and after a biiiiiiiiig downward doggie-stretch, she drunkenly hobbles out of her kennel and collapses into my lap. The silly girl makes snorting and whimpering sounds, little puppy murmurs of love, while mauling my arms, my legs, and flicking light kisses up to my nose. She snorts around my ears, and then bites my earlobe, gently suckling as if to say, “I love you, mama!” After our love-fest on the floor, with lots of petting and nuzzling, she follows me straight to the door and we head outside for her morning chores.

My animals mean the world to me. Each day starts brightly because of them, and each time I enter our home I’m greeted with their presence. For me, being in the presence of animals is a magical and humbling experience. It reminds me of how alike we all are in this world, how they too experience emotions and communicate not only with each other but between species and to us human animals. Their personalities amaze and delight me, and I marvel at how they grow and change, how they express love and hurt. We are not so different.

I have always considered myself an “animal lover.” From the natural inclination toward compassion as a child, up through delighting in witnessing animals around me and in nature as an adult, I’ve always been tender toward and fascinated by them. Growing up, we always had pets. I liked to refer to them as the “family pack,” generally filled with a menagerie of shelter-pets: dogs, cats, rabbits, rats, and/or hamsters. Though I grew up in a city, I was always in awe when we’d visit my aunt’s farm. I would go over to where the cows were penned and reach out to stroke their noses, feeling solemn over their captivity in a muddy rink.

I remember my delight as a child when a robin built her nest in a wreath on the front porch. I was so excited to see little blue eggs in the nest and be able to witness– up close and personal—as the robin flew back and forth right at eye level. I remember when, to my horror and dismay, my parent decided the nest was too messy (and the droppings, particularly) and tossed it out. I cried and cried over the little nest and the little blue eggs.

Occasionally in my childhood, my dad would go hunting with my uncle, a self-proclaimed “sportsman” who, to this day, prides himself in his “game.” I have always refused to eat deer, most likely out of my association with the children’s movie Bambi, and was nauseated by the smell of grinding raw flesh in our home. One of these times, when I was probably around age eight, my dad brought home a deer. I went outside to play and opened the garage door, only to be confronted by an upside down, bloody and skinned dead deer. His tongue was hanging out, eyes bulging, and blood pooling on the garage floor. I screamed in horror and ran away crying. The memory haunts me still today.

Another particular instance stands out in my mind—a dinner with family. My mom cooked Cornish game hens for dinner, and had a mini headless bird on each plate. This was a “special fancy” meal. I think I was in middle school around this time, so I knew that the chicken we eat is the same feathered bird I knew from farms and children’s books, but even still I couldn’t handle seeing the bird “in its body form” and eat it. The sight of this mini “chicken” on my plate had me an emotional mess. I couldn’t cut it up, break apart the bones, or tear off the skin. It was too barbaric (and I do believe I used that same word to my mom when I refused). My mom laughed, amused my childish refusal. Now, had the bird been torn apart and shredded into pieces, unrecognizable from the feathered animal I knew, I would have had no problem eating it (and did not, at any other time until recently).

It amazes me now, as I look back and reflect on all these vivid experiences and associations I had as a child (and even as a young woman – a similar experience to the Cornish hen dinner, when I started crying as my mom tried to show me how to cut up a whole baked chicken), that I didn’t make the connection earlier. I can see how all these experiences have shaped me into who I am now, and how illogical it was for me to stay closed to what I intuitively knew all along. I was known to say things like, “I don’t want to know where my meat comes from” and “If I had to actually kill the chicken/cow/pig myself, I don’t think I could eat it.” Acknowledging that the food on my plate came from the carcass of a formerly live being was an unhappy and disturbing thought for me. I would prefer to think that “chicken breasts” were altogether just a separate thing from the chicken (after all, they come sold separately in big frozen bags, right?), and that “steak” is just its own delightfully delicious food, not the severed muscle from a doe-eyed gentle cow.

What I’ve realized over the past year and a half, and truly awakened to over the past month, is that I was blinded by selective compassion. Our society has taught us that after a certain age, usually the “naïve child” age, only certain animals are worthy of compassion. The others are not. Their “purpose” (as defined by human animals) is to be eaten. That is it. And why is this their “purpose”? Because we’ve developed a taste for their flesh. We like how they taste. That’s it.

Why do we love cats and dogs and (some) rabbits as family members, while consuming other animals – not so different from the same ones we love—on our dinner plates each day? How can we balk at the notion of some cultures eating the very animals we love (namely, cats and dogs in Asian countries), while not stir a bit as we shovel the flesh of cows, chickens, and pigs into our gullets daily? Are they not worthy because we do not find them enjoyable household companions? Is that really what “worth” comes down to?

The animals we artificially bring into this world only for the sole purpose of killing and consuming them are valuable as animals in their unique ways. How is forcefully breeding and slaughtering and eating cows and steer any different than, let’s say, doing the same to horses? Or zebras? Or moose? Or… dogs?

Well, you might say, horses are for working, and riding, and they help us in so many ways. That’s why it’s not okay to eat them. But… wild horses… who exist only because they exist and have a right to their lives… what about them? Do they “help” us? Is that where their worth comes from?

I’m seeing the hypocrisy in my own ways of thinking for so many years. Believing that we, as humans, have the power to define the worth and “purpose” of the animals we’ve named and dominated. It’s just so wrong to me now. Each of these animals, be they wild or unnaturally bred for our appetites, do not exist here “just for us.” They have their own right to life, and unique characteristics and personalities and social interactions that make them not so unlike us human animals. I am sure that if I cared for a chicken, pig, or calf with the same tender love and attention I give to my cats and dog, I would see that they too have personalities, value, and unique social interactions.

I know there are so many rebuttals that pop up when I enter this discussion, and I don’t have the time or energy to attempt to cover all ruffled arguments against compassion in one breath. And that’s not what I’m trying to do. I can’t change anyone but me. But what has been so life-changing for me over the past month have been these few realizations:

I don’t want to contribute to violence against any beings in this world, to the best of my ability. I can’t be perfect, but I do know the biggest step I can make on a daily basis (and the simplest) is to choose to leave animals and their secretions off my plate.

I do wish to live a compassionate and awakened life. In being compassionate, and a Christian and believer in God, I don’t see it as “our place” to “dominate” and use other creatures cruelly and violently just to satisfy our palates. God gives us minds to discern options, and souls to seek moral and ethical choices. I see the most compassionate and loving Christ-like choice is to abstain from the system of inherent cruelty that is bringing animals into the world only to slaughter and eat them.This is wrong to me.

We are blessed with a bounty of plants to nourish our bodies. In the Garden of Eden, we were given the plants to feast upon. (Plants do not, to our knowledge, have nervous systems or experience pain; they are not sentient.) There was not killing and slaughter. It was a peaceful place, where animals likely existed before man. We do not need animal flesh to live healthy, nourished and full lives. We can exist healthily (and much more so, might I add) without consuming them. So why continue to perpetuate a cruel and violent system because we have a “taste” for their flesh?

For these reasons, I have chosen to live vegan. And I have never felt more at peace and filled with joy over how I am eating! Choosing to live vegan is about aligning my values and beliefs with my daily choices. I believe it is right to live with compassion, to not knowingly participate in violence toward humans or non-human animals. I believe in treating my body, and the bodies of other live, sentient and feeling beings, with respect and honor. I believe in eating healthfully and mindfully. I believe in doing what I can, even if it’s not everything perfectly, to change the world and the systems of violence in it. And I believe that if we desire world peace and hope for violence to end between human races and countries, we also need to cease violence against are non-human animals with whom we share this earth.

I cannot personally stop a war between peoples. I cannot personally change the terrorism of nations. I cannot ensure the peace and safety of all animals.

But I can choose a veggie burger over eating a dead cow. I can cook delicious, nourishing and satisfying veggie meals. I can choose not continue to support the slaughter of animals by what I put on my dinner plate and the items I buy for my body and home.

So I think I’ll start there.

Thanks for reading, and being respectful.

Wishing you deepest love and compassion,

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What I “Really” Look Like: Healthy Body in Unflattering & Flattering Photos

I am a beautiful woman.

I say this not to sound arrogant or narcissistic, but to point out a reality that I often struggle to acknowledge and accept with humility. I am beautiful, and so are you.

We as women have such deeply rooted self-esteem battles, that are ever aggravated in the bombarding of daily media we face. We’re constantly measuring ourselves against the woman next to us, the face on the magazine cover, the girl in the commercial, the blogger, the facebook friend whose Instagramed “selfies” are filtered over unrecognizably. There is no shortage of ways to fall short in the measures of beauty we hold ourselves to. It’s obscene, really.

And it’s bull. It’s utterly insane, self-degrading and abusive, and makes no sense at all. How can we live a life of health and happiness if we are constantly beating ourselves down? Constantly comparing ourselves to the appearance and standards of others? There is no safety or self-esteem in a life like this. Only self-hatred and a constant feeling of lack.

I’ve been struggling with this on and off for my whole life – much like you have, I’d guess. When I decided to embark on a journey toward a more fit body and mind, I knew that losing weight wouldn’t solve all my problems. (And it didn’t.) Sure, I felt better in a healthier, smaller and stronger body, but the mental hurdles I faced still kept me cycling in and out of self-abuse and talk. I’d look in the mirror and ONLY see the cellulite. I’d scour magazines for health tips and beauty tips and the best workout to “tone my abs.” It didn’t matter that my weight was healthy, my body strong and capable, or that my husband adores me—only that no matter how hard I tried, I could never get those six-pack abs, that cellulite-free butt or that tiny waist. I could try on a pair of size four jeans in one store—and feel like I was on top of the world!—then go to the next and barely squeeze into a “juniors” (ha!) size 11, and then feel like I was fat and gross.

Admittedly, I sometimes still have these feelings. I have low-self esteem days here and there, and wonder if I’ll ever just be OK and happy in my skin.

But those days are few. And I am proud to say that MOST days, I truly do believe I am beautiful and don’t need to measure up to any of the other women I see. Because I’m me, and I’m healthy and worthy and good as I am.

I’ve had these thoughts on my mind a lot in the past few days since I read this very inspiring blog post by Fit Mama Training. Check it out here: fitmamatraining.com/what-i-really-look-like-a-perfectly-healthy-body-in-more-and-less-flattering-photos/

She posts a chain of photos of her real, beautiful and healthy body in some unflattering and flattering angles. It was so inspiring to read her words of confidence and truth – I felt the desire to do the same.

So, my friends, today I share with you some real photos of my healthy body, in more and less flattering angles. They’re not filtered or edited, just real unprofessional quick shots from today.

We start this morning… post-shower, wet hair and no makeup. I have a few blemishes, and usually do. I’ve always struggled with feeling ugly whenever I get breakouts (which has been almost always, from about age 12 to 25), and I’m trying to be more gentle with myself and not “attack” my skin at night (since abusing it by picking only makes it angrier and worse!).

Torso shot… not flexing, not slouching… just standing. I don’t have a “perfectly toned core” and no matter how thin I’ve gotten in the past, I can’t get definition or much for a defined waist. It’s just how my body is shaped and that’s okay. I can “pinch an inch” around my hips and tummy. I also have stretch marks on my hips and thighs and butt, and I have tiny breasts. All these things are okay, and don’t make me less beautiful.

Here is a more flattering angle, in my yoga booty-shorts and sports bra. I weighed myself after breakfast and workout today, and I’m around 150 pounds (5’10”). This is on the high side of maintenance for me, but it’s easy to fluctuate between 147-151 without effort. When I try to keep my weight between 143-145, it takes more effort—careful eating and more rigorous exercise. For the few pounds difference, no one notices but me. And I don’t care that much anymore.

Squattin’! Leg muscle definition, strong booty. 

More flattering angle. Sucked in, flexed tummy. Not much definition, but lots of muscle!

Less flattering angle. Different lighting, slumping down, pooching out over shorts. Baby-love handles and soft pooch. Still okay.

Less flattering angle. Slumpy slouchy. Intentionally pooching out belly and hunching over. Not so cute? Still okay.

GROSS FACE! Slumpy hunchy. Rippled “belly fat.” 

Pulled the shorts waistline down a bit, and I can REALLY stick out the belly. Looks like I could lose a little fat here, doesn’t it? Could make a good “before / after” photo, even just compared to some of the more flattering pics above!

Booty-shot. Not perfectly toned. I have cellulite. That’s okay. This booty can squat, balance in yoga poses and run me far!

More flattering shot, differently lighting. Flexing abs.

Difficult behind-the-head-mirror-back shot. I have muscle back there.

All dressed up and made-up! Normal day look for me. Flattering lighting and angle.

Unflattering face. Double chin!

Big grin! Less cute angle, but real me. I have little wrinkles and blemishes.

Different lighting, different look. Still okay!

Full body shot, all dressed up and accessorized.

That’s me, folks. Lots of angles, lots of realness. And I’m beautiful, and so are you.

My hope in sharing these photos and thoughts is not to give myself an ego-boost. I don’t need that from you, as I’m learning to boost myself in a healthy way each day. I’m hoping to give YOU a shot of confidence, knowing that you are gorgeous and worthy, with or without a filter or photoshop. Don’t compare yourself to me, because you’re NOT me. Ya get what I’m saying?

You are uniquely and perfectly YOU. And that’s enough. Because you’re enough.

Stop all the comparison. Stop trying to make your body like someone else’s. Stop the “fitspiration” pages collecting photos of people with totally different genetic makeup than you. You won’t look like them, even following their workouts and diet plans!

Today, I challenge you to see through the judgment, through the comparison, and the unflattering angles. See that you ARE enough, you ARE beautiful, and you CAN be healthy and happy in your skin.

Be beautiful. Be you!

If you’d like some support along the way, making a shift to a happier and healthier internal and external YOU, please let me know. Powerful change can happen over the course of a few months with the right support and steps to make it happen. Be well, my beautiful friends!

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Will You Be Your Valentine?

During the week of flowers, chocolates, stuffed animals, and incessant advertising by jewelry companies, I thought it might be an appropriate time to sit back and consider what this holiday of love means outside of commercial pressures. Sure, it’s a blatant opportunity to remind those in our life that we love and care for them, and a glaring day of loneliness to those who may feel unloved without a romantic partner… but isn’t it more? Can’t it be more?

I think it should be. And is. And so is every day. It’s an opportunity to truly turn inward and showourselves the love and care we need and deserve.

Have you ever hated yourself? Or, if not hated, perhaps berated? Chastised, verbally or mentally abused, physically abused through harm or guilty, angry eating? I know I have.

I know I’ve done a poor job of actually treating myself with the same love and respect I treat others. I have been a poor friend to me, been abusive and degrading, and really loathed my very existence on occasions. I’ve felt unlovable, beaten down inside, and unworthy of happiness. I thought that if I punished myself enough for my failures and ineptitudes it would somehow motivate me to improve, to suck less, to be a better person.

What I’ve learned over the last several years is that hating myself and dishonoring my body and mind has done no good at all. In fact, it’s only held me back, and made bumps in the road feel like mountains. When I started to honor myself, to love and nurture and pamper the internal and external me, I realized I could be a better person. I felt worthy. I felt like I was competent and resilient, and that I DO deserve happiness.

I have been thinking a lot about these things lately, particularly after I was feeling overwhelmed and overstretched with my to-do list, and posted a facebook status wondering how parents handle it all with children. I immediately got a whole chain of responses by parents saying things similar to “your children become your life” and that it’s all about “putting yourself second to them.” When I expressed my understanding that yes, children do become and ARE a main priority, but I think it’s important to balance the self in a life with children, I felt immediately “mommy-shamed” (and I’m not even a mom yet!), as if my admittance that self-love is still important somehow made me a selfish person and unfit to be a good parent.

Something occurred to me when I was pondering this interaction and social norm – self-sacrifice for the good of others: Loving yourself less does not mean you can therefore love others more. You do not better the world or others around you – be they your children or strangers in another continent – by self-sacrificing, self-deprecating, and self-abusing. Love is not a tangible thing (like money), where you give less to yourself and you have more to give to others. Love is endless, intangible, ever expanding and conceiving. The more you give, the more you have.

And the more you honor and love yourself, the better person you can be to others.You will feel valuable. You’ll feel honored and respected. And when you feel that way, you want others to feel it too. So you share of yourself, your time, your possessions, and love.

Now, I’m not saying that you should love your children less or love others less – I hope that’s clear. And I’m certainly not saying that you should put your “beauty rest” or personal pampering wants before the immediate needs of a baby’s diaper changing or tending to hungry children (i.e. being a responsible and loving parent). But what I am saying is that there is a way to keep self-love in our lives without it being selfishness. These things are not the same at all.

Self-love is about honor and respect of life. It’s about seeing God within you – precious and good – and allowing that light to shine forth to others. It’s about modeling a behavior of treating your SELF the way you want others to treat you, and you want to treat others!

Selfishness is about denying others and seeing no value outside the self. It’s a callous armor of cowardice, a refusal to open and be vulnerable or share with others. It is not love, and it disrespects the value of others in your life.

Can you see how these things are sooooooo not the same thing?

When you make a practice of including time and activities in your life that honor your talents and interests, and nurture both your body and soul, you can truly be a better person/parent/sibling/friend/etc. You earn no medallions and save no lives by disrespecting and belittling your self and your own worth in your life.

So, I ask you this today: Will you be your own Valentine? How can you choose to honor and love yourself in a way that makes you a better parent, and a happier, more conscious person? What gift will you give yourself this week—and next week, and the week after –to renew the love you have for you? For many of my clients, even a simple 30 minutes set aside for a bubble bath or a designated activity they enjoy just for them can be the perfect way to nourish and refresh the body, mind, and soul.

I would love to hear what you’re going to do this week as your act of self-love and care. Please comment below, or share on facebook or in an email. You are worthy of love. Even by you.

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From the Depths of a Slump

As you know, life has its ups and downs.

The past month for me has been a series of mostly downs, unfortunately.

Those who read/have read my blogs regularly know that I am overall a pretty positive, upbeat person who tends to take change pretty well by comparison to most. I’m a go-go-go girl, and like to charge forward into the horizon with a can-do attitude and gutsy leap into the unknown.

Sometimes, though, I get knocked flat down. And then I just lay there for a while, feeling hurt, sad, mad, frustrated, and sorry for myself.

I started October in my usual manner – go-go-go get ‘em – with the sight for a wild ride of three workshops plus one cooking class to come! I set a goal to prioritize my yoga practice, and stay on-top of my to-do list at home and with work. It was looking all well and good until a phone call on Thursday morning, the 11th of October literally knocked me flat.

I was in yoga practice, and had missed about 8 calls from my mother. I had forgotten my phone at home (truthfully – I am thankful for that), so I didn’t see all the missed calls until I was safe at home, alone. I immediately called her, and was shocked to hear that my Grandma Joan had unexpectedly passed away in her sleep. They found her dead in bed that morning when she didn’t come for breakfast. I collapsed in sobs on the floor of my office, feeling the walls around me crumbling as I tried to process this new reality.

She was gone. Just… gone.

I’ve faced a chain of losses in the past three years of my life, and unfortunately, I see more coming in the not-so-distant future. It seems we each come to a few points in life like this, where we face the deaths of so many of our elder loved ones, be they four-legged or two. In 2008 I lost my Grandpa Abe; in May 2009 I lost my Grandpa Bill, followed by my childhood chocolate lab (my 12 year-old “sister”) before my birthday in July, and then my Grandpa YZ in November 2009. I lost my 18 year-old childhood cat in 2010, and then my other childhood dog Maggie, a 12 year-old golden retriever, in 2011. Despite experiencing these grievances, none have compared to the hole I feel in my life at the loss of my Grandma Joan. We were very close, and she always spoiled me, from when I was a baby to just last month. I loved her very very deeply, and made a point to go for lunch and treats with her often, have her for dinner, and stop by to bring her cookies when I was out and about. 

I share all of this today for a few reasons. First, it is therapeutic for me to express my loss through written word, and second, to illustrate that no matter where we are in life, health, or happiness, there are twists in the road that will inevitably send you into a slump. 

Since 10-11-12, I haven’t really been “myself.” I’m trying to get back into what is a “new normal” for me, but have been struggling to hoist myself from the ditch of grief. I’ve noticed that old crutches and behaviors have resurfaced (particularly emotional eating, and too much sugar), and I’ve felt extra lethargic and tired, like I can sleep forever. I haven’t been as motivated in my yoga practice or workouts, and find myself lacking the drive to DO, like I normally have.

Even those of us who seem to have the “health thing” down pat still fall into slumps. 

But the important thing for me is that I recognize this past month as just that – a temporary slump –not a tailspin into an old way of life. I’ve needed the time to turn inward, experience my pain and struggles, and just exist in it for a bit. I know the process isn’t complete yet, and will I will always have a spot in my heart for my Grandma, but I’m opening up to the change life brought, however untimely it may have been. 

This month, as we head into some of the craziest weeks of the year with the holidays and financial stress they bring, I will continue to take small steps toward reclaiming the me and life that I love and deserve. I can’t change the past. I can’t erase the weeks of pain and emotional eating. What I can dois to understand that like all things, this too shall pass.

Each day we are granted with a new opportunity to create a life and body that we love and cherish. Each day I wake to open my eyes yet again, I must give thanks for the blessing of breath, and possibility. 

If you are in slump like I am, do not fret. It is normal, and part of the journey of life. Even if your slump has been a month, a year, or maybe 10 years, today is a new day. What will you make of it, and how can you learn from the depths of the slump you’ve experienced?
Dedicated in loving memory of Grandma Joan Larson, March 19, 1930 – October 11, 2012 ~ May she live forever on in the lives of the remarkable children and grandchildren she raised.

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Creating Your Life

This morning over breakfast with my best friend, we had a discussion about passions and living with purpose. We were talking about how sometimes our “passions” may be fleeting and lead us in a wayward direction, but there seems to be a deeper inner drive that we each feel meant to pursue and fulfill in our lives.

We both agreed that we are meant to create.

Outside of just “passions” – or really, overzealous hobbies – we both feel the deep longing and need to create and make. For me, in my exploration of careers and direction, I originally thought this need could be met by a career in graphic design (similarly, my best friend is also a graphic designer). I have always appreciated art, and been a hobby artist myself. I love to draw, to layout materials, to design greeting cards with the perfect combinations of texture and color and shape…so why not do it for a living? I quickly found myself gasping for air (and inspiration) in the design/marketing/advertising world, and my inner spirit felt dead doing mundane projects for the same companies over and over again. There was no creation. Nothing sung to me or through me. I felt trapped and lifeless, doing what I had thought was “my passion.”

FARGO_theatre.jpgOver the past few years, my passions have taken me in a few different directions to ultimately land me where I am now, feeling more at peace and fulfilled doing work that I love each day. I started out of college as a newspaper editor, transitioned to a graphic designer at an ad-agency, then to a graphic artist at a printing company. Along the way, I started teaching voice lessons to fill my spirit and joy of music in my life, and also picked up a part-time position as the music and arts coordinator at my church. These side-jobs filled my drive to createmore than any of the work I was doing in my main jobs, which occupied my mind and time for the majority of my week.

I knew it was time to switch directions…but what direction would allow me to create and really be inspired and joyful about what I’m doing (without any alternative motive to manipulate or sell to consumers for money’s sake)?

Listening to this inner need to create and following the lead of my natural gifts and talents, I have found myself in a place of true soulful inspiration and joy. I realized that outside a natural “eye” for design and visual art, my gifts are more strongly suited to working with people and creating relationships among those who are hungry for more joy in their lives. Though I don’t create advertisements or company logos like I used to, I am satisfying my need to create by fostering more meaningful creations in my life.

I create inspiration. I create relationships. I create goals. I help others to create happier, healthier lives for themselves and those they influence. 

And that, my friends, is the best kind of creation to me. The kind the inspires you to create a life you love.

What is your innate need and longing? Are you satisfying it by what you’re doing today? If not, how can you explore what other ways in life you can fulfill your calling?

We are Creations and Creators in this life. Today I encourage you to take one tiny step toward creating a life you love. You are a product of where you devote most of your energy. Are you channeling it in a direction that creates the kind of opportunity and passion you long for?

Create a life you love. It is in your power. Do you believe me?