Reflections on a Decade of Maintenance

The start of the year always brings reflections on health, gratitudes, goals, and ambitions for me. As I was thinking about the last decade, I started digging through old blog posts I made about 9-10 years ago. I remember feeling really focused after I lost weight in 2010, and felt like I had two years of experimentation before settling into what felt like a consistent “lifestyle” of wellness. I dabbled in several variations of what healthy-maintenance would be, as I was also learning about dietary theories in my health coaching program through Integrative Nutrition. Eventually, I found plant-based eating to be the most conducive to health – physically, mentally, and ethically – for me in this journey, and made the transition in 2012. 

Since reviving my career as a health coach in 2019, I’ve had a lot of self-doubt. Am I healthy enough, inspiring enough, knowledgeable enough, fit enough (insert ___ “enough” here) to be a health coach and help other people figure this stuff out? While I am truly most passionate about the “lifestyle” coaching part of health coaching, I found a place within the weight-loss industry, which has plenty of pros and cons, particularly for someone as goal-oriented as myself. At VitaLife, we utilize BIA technology to determine body composition, and help clients see measurable progress in their bodies and health. The downside to this being available for me each day is that I can attach a lot of needless-significance on what the damn thing says about ME… and then start to splice apart my insecurities and feelings of “enough-ness” over and over again if the numbers don’t reflect what I think they should for my profession. 

My mental health journey is in constant evolution of self-awareness and processing, and a big part of that is writing and discussing these things with people close to me. Over the last few months, I’ve felt frustrated that in spite of all my consistent efforts with my health, I haven’t seen the gratification I wanted (and felt was “deserved”) from the very technology I utilize and celebrate for others each day. And just recently, it has started to become more clear after a conversation with a fellow health-coach co-worker…

… I have been wanting the buzz and affirmation that comes from the *weight-loss and transition journey* even as I’m in active *maintenance* of a healthy lifestyle. It’s almost like wishing I could learn to swim across a pool, while actively swimming across the ocean. 

My job as a coach is to model healthy lifestyle behaviors, and actively guide people through the process of transitioning into their version of a healthy lifestyle. It’s funny looking at it a different way, because the part I crave (validation and buzz of change during weight-loss) is what they are experiencing, while my clients crave what I have (the consistency and routine of maintaining a healthy body through a flexible diet and lifestyle). 

Looking back on my posts from 2012, I found the following that I wanted to share again. I’m pleased to say that although there are some differences from then to now, I really have found a pretty solid balance in what my ‘healthy lifestyle’ looks like, and maintained it for close to a decade.

June 16, 2012: SparkPeople Blog post

… I feel like I’m truly coming into my healthy balance. A great deal of my life still feels chaotic at times, but I’m finding as I make better, more peaceful and less obsessive choices with my food and fitness, the chaos is easier to tame and manage. Here is what my healthy balance looks like today: 

• I eat 90% plant-based (vegan), with occasional dairy or eggs (ice cream is my biggest weakness, and cheese is sometimes a “necessity” in social dining out, like having pizza with my family) 

• I exercise 3-4 times per week by running, yoga classes, walking, or home DVDs 

• I walk daily between 15-30 minutes, usually on work breaks

• I drink tons of water (upwards of 100-115 ounces per day), and always start my days with 24 oz. of water before breakfast or other beverages 

• I get 7-8 hours of sleep every night, go to bed by 10 pm, and up between 5-6 am 

• I cook all whole foods in my home, and eat out a few times per week 

• I have a green smoothie nearly every weekday for breakfast and a slice of toast with nut-butter 

• I don’t snack nearly as often as I used to 

• I take vitamins daily (multi, flax-oil, folic acid, and calcium) 

• I don’t drink pop. Ever. 

• I cut out my coffee habit, and no longer use caffeine in the mornings to wake me up; I will have green tea or coffee occasionally for a treat 

• I eat a ton of fresh fruits, vegetables, and whole foods daily 

• I buy and eat almost entirely organic 

• I try to eat mindfully without distraction, but still sometimes give in to watching TV during dinner ;) 

• I enjoy treats daily, but no longer use white flour or sugar in my kitchen 

• I have a ton of energy (usually) and stay busy daily 

• I am strong and flexible: I can run long distances (although I’m not fast), I can do 50 push-ups in a row, and I can hold arm and toe-balance poses in my yoga practice, do forward bends, and move in ways I never used to be able 

• I do not have a six-pack or defined abs 

• My thighs jiggle, I have cellulite and stretch marks on my legs and butt, and my tummy still looks soft and mooshy when I sit down 

* I eat lots of dark leafy greens DAILY 

* I wear a size 4/6 pants (sometimes an 8 in certain brands or styles) and small/medium tops 

* I weigh around 148 pounds (I am 5’10”) 

• I am not perfect, but I am healthy and happy 

Whitney – 2011 vs. 2021

January 14, 2021: Update

Nearly a decade later… as a mom to an almost-five-year old, and stepmom to two teenagers. Living my best life in my 30s. Here is what my healthy balance looks like today:

• I eat 95-98% plant-based (vegan), with very rare dairy or eggs (generally in a baked good or dish while dining out; I’m not perfect but aim for mostly plants) 

• I exercise 5-6  times per week by gym HIIT workouts, home HIIT with BodyFit app, running, walking 

• I try to walk daily, either taking the dog for a mile walk, or just stepping on the treadmill for 15 min.

• I drink tons of water (upwards of 100-115 ounces per day), and always start my days with a fizzy water (molecular hydrogen) and ph-mineral water

• I get 7-8 hours of sleep almost every night

• I cook all whole foods in my home, and eat out a few times per week 

• I have a green smoothie nearly every weekday for breakfast or my first meal of the day (I usually don’t eat until 11:00 am- noon)

• I snack very rarely (working on cutting out bedtime/TV snacking & alcohol consumption- my only pitfall with snacks and “empty calories”)

• I take vitamins daily (probiotic, magnesium, vitamin C, cranberry, vegan DHA, vitamin D)

• I don’t drink pop. (hardly ever)

• I eat a ton of fresh fruits, vegetables, and whole grains daily

• I enjoy treats daily, but rarely make things with lots of sugar (I only use organic cane sugar if any – and often use monk fruit sweetener or stevia)

• I try to cook and bake with minimal oil – and will use broth or water if able.

• I have a ton of energy (usually) and stay busy daily 

• I am strong and flexible: I can run long distances (although I’m not fast), I can do 50 burpees in a row, and I can hold arm and toe-balance poses in my yoga practice, do forward bends, and lift heavy at the gym. I can do a headstand, and am working on my handstand practice. I have more metabolic cardiovascular health than ever before.

• I do not have a six-pack or defined abs, and still have a sheath of fat on my tummy + stretch marks from pregnancy and birth.

• My thighs jiggle, I have cellulite and stretch marks on my legs and butt, and my tummy still looks soft and mooshy when I sit down 

* I eat lots of dark leafy greens DAILY (green smoothies are my JAM!!)

* I wear a size 6/8 pants and small/medium tops 

* I weigh around 155 pounds, and fluctuate about 3-4 pounds up or down (I am 5’10”) 

I am not perfect, but I am healthy and happier than ever before in my life.

Here is wishing for your best health and balance in 2021. Keep the momentum going. You can only manifest the life you focus on creating each day, step by step.

-Whitney

It’s about the journey.

We’ve all heard that before, right? “Health is a journey, not a destination.” It’s a cliche because it’s true. 

I remember when it first “clicked” to me that I was ready to change my lifestyle, to lose weight, and feel better. I was 22 years old, freshly married, and really unhappy with how adulthood was panning out for me. Go to work, come home, sit and watch TV, eat a box of mac ‘n cheese, make a box of brownies, pour a rum ‘n coke. Sit. Sleep. Wake. Repeat. 

UGH. Blaaaaah! That kind of life was NOT leading to a healthy or happy person at all. So something shifted inside and I had this ‘ah-ha’ realization that I could redirect myself any time I damn well pleased.

And I was ready to do it, please and thank you.

As a naturally reward-centered and goal-oriented person, I set my first goal: to lose weight. I understand that weight-loss is NOT always an indication of health or wellness, or even positive changes for people. Oftentimes, weight loss is a scapegoat for some other deep seeded issues that people fixate on, and weight can be the ultimate blame or the ultimate “game” to focus on instead of whatever is really at the crux. But it was a natural first place for me to start, having never thought much about my weight before then (at least not obsessed over it). 

I was never an athlete growing up. I hated sports, hated games, and didn’t like being last and losing everything I attempted. (I had a few demoralizing years of attempting soccer, tennis, and track… nope nope nope.) So for me, getting started with anything fitness-wise was a first-ever attempt as an adult.

Working in a weight-loss clinic now, and having many years of health coaching experience under my belt, I can see how people wind up in the ‘yo-yo’ mentality with their weight. (See: scapegoat or distraction, above.) The real clincher I’ve found to be true in working with clients who are successful in losing weight and keeping it off is that there is a perceptible shift in how they think about their lives and themselves.

That happened for me – a life changing shift. It became not IF I lose the weight, but WHEN I lose the weight. (Again – “the weight” isn’t actually necessarily the problem here – but it was a tangible and measurable benchmark for me to start with in leading to a whole new lifestyle.)

The difference in thinking “If” versus “when” literally changed the direction of my life.

In my 20’s, I went through many phases in this journey. The first phase was weight-loss, and then it was active maintenance and calorie tracking. Then I shifted to intuitive eating, and started my journey to becoming a health coach. I tried the runner phase (I still run, but it’s not my sole identity), signing up for races, trying to better my distance and pace. I tried a yogi-phase (still love it, but am out of practice), and consistently did hot yoga and vinyasa, wore my mala beads and hippy-style clothes. I tried the body-building phase (which I’m still actively lifting now, but with a different approach), doing meaty meal-prep and steamed broccoli and egg whites…. Then I moved into the vegetarian>vegan phase… and then almost five years ago, I became a mom and had to readjust everything again.

Throughout all these stages, I was constantly looking for my next focus. Weight Loss. Maintenance. Health. Fitness. Motherhood. 

So what’s next? I’m already healthy. (check) I’m already pretty fit. (check) I’m already plant-based. (check) I’m an active mom, I work doing the things I love, married to a man I love. (check) I’m literally happier than I’ve ever been before. (I can’t believe how lucky I feel!)

You may be wondering why bother with a “next,” why not just stay right where you are? 

Because where I am is organic, ever changing, ever shifting and running through my fingers like an active stream. 

It’s not a destination. It’s a journey. 

It struck me that the next phase of my journey that feels right is a focus on improving my athleticism. 

For years, I’ve gone in phases of being more or less obsessive about exactly the number on the scale (for reference: I’m about 15 pounds heavier than my lowest weight, 10 years ago). But I’m seeing now that in my current life, this number has no place of health or wellness for me. I’ve already established habits that keep me healthy, so my weight is not a reflection of my health. I’m already very active, so it’s not a reflection of my lack of activity. My weight is simply my relationship with gravity. 

So it’s time to find a new focus. And I like the idea of being an athlete, growing into the “gains” I can make – the feats I can accomplish in this blessed strong body, versus how many pounds I can force it to shed. 

As a person who has never considered herself an athlete before, I’m ready to become one. I will never be an olympian or a professional anything. But I WILL be a badass 30-something mom who can squat and lift and sprint and curl. 

And you know what? You can decide to be whomever you want to be, whenever you want to. 

It’s never too late to be whomever you want to be.

Join your journey, just as you are. 

Starting Over: Part 1

We all have to start over at some point in our lives.

Depending on how you’re feeling about it, the process can either be incredibly painful, or a fresh bright chance at a new beginning. For many of us, starting over can actually be a complicated mess of both these emotions, tangled up in this indecipherable web of conflicting feelings. 

I’ve had many years to process what happened to my dream, to my career vision with health coaching, and even to my marriage that waned and bent under the weight of failures and miscommunications. I started She Lives Fit as a bright and beaming 24 year old, ready to take on the world and make waves of positive change. Less than a year into my venture, I realized it was going to take a lot more financial security to make ends meet for my husband and I, and I gradually eased back into part time and eventually full time employment in other ventures. I was devastated, but still continued to accept a few clients on the side of my many hours of work and private teaching and volunteering.

In 2016, I birthed my son. Becoming a mother fundamentally shifted my entire life. (I feel like there should be a warning about the degree to which women feel altered hormonally and emotionally while breastfeeding, even when it’s not fully considered postpartum depression.) It was the closure of any “free time” I had to engage in entrepreneurial work while also working full-time and nursing my infant. I quietly let the door shutter on my dream, as my strained marriage and family responsibilities took its steady toll on any flicker of hope I had left.

I mourned the loss of this dream. Mourned it, cried over it, berated myself, gained some weight, struggled with certain healthy habits amidst roils of life change, and eventually just concluded I needed a new dream. Washed my hands. Moving forward. “You failed. Suck it up, buttercup.”

I experienced the end of my first marriage throughout this mourning process as well. Cue sweeping waves of emotional ruin, complete devastation… and somewhere buried under the ash: the smallest seed of hope for a new life and new dream ahead.

Starting over isn’t easy. Anyone who has been through a traumatic “end” of some kind knows that. And sometimes the way we start over is just by licking our wounds, tending to our emotional scars, and taking one baby-step at a time into a new existence.

Thankfully, the end of one chapter of my life began the start of a beautiful new vision and reality. I started my life over, grew into a more confident mother by single parenting, resolved to do better in my future relationships, and build myself into the self-made and confident woman I knew I could be and wanted to be back when I was 21 years old. I remarried – and have so much to be thankful for. My spouse is loving, encouraging, and supportive in all the right ways. From the beginning of our relationship, when I confessed my feelings of devastation and failure with my business, he said it wasn’t over. He said he could see it happening again – just with the right foundation in place. He believed in me long before I believed in myself, and for that I am so grateful.

When we got married, I quit my full-time employment in medical care, and moved into the position I hold currently with VitaLife: working in health and wellness coaching again, with the security of a business model that I knew would be successful, and support at home to make it happen. I also was able to focus on my private voice studio and expand the number of students I could teach. Everything was falling into place.

A few months ago, I was looking through bank statements and saw my recurring monthly web-hosting payment on my ledger, and got extremely agitated. 

“This is so dumb, Whitney. Why keep this stupid website you never even update or use, when you aren’t coaching on your own!? You keep paying year after year to keep this useless thing, just cancel it already.”

I slogged through the irritating process of resetting my usernames and passwords because I couldn’t remember any of it, and got logged in to my host site and hovered over “cancel”… I clicked it… and it said, “Are you sure you want to cancel and deactivate your domain?” 

And I hesitated. I wasn’t sure.

That tiny seed under the ash had been growing subconsciously, being watered and tended lovingly with the affirmations of my husband and the little pieces of fate falling into place over the last year with my jobs and life. I’ve been happier and more content than ever, which is the most fertile place for hope to germinate and thrive.

I didn’t want to give it up. I didn’t cancel, and I didn’t let go.

After a lot of discussion, excited brainstorming, and the right support, I decided it was time to refocus. Time to relaunch my dream, in a new direction and with my new life. I know so much more than I did nearly a decade ago when this all began. My life looks totally different, and so does our society and cultural norms. (And amidst the COVID nightmare we are all experiencing, I have had a lot more time at home to fill with work and projects.) The equation is completely different now….

It’s time to start over.

And I’m so glad that you’re here.

Within or Without Motivation

 

Almost exactly four years ago, I was laid off from my job as a graphic designer, and fell into my lowest of lows of my young professional adulthood. I felt so little self-worth, and like all hope was lost… until something clicked inside me, and I just got annoyed enough with my pathetic attitude and choices that I decided to change. That little light bulb was the initial push I needed to really change my lifestyle and begin prioritizing my health. Somehow, things started to finally make sense – that I had control over my pant size and my attitude equally – that I could and would change if I wanted to.

That fresh beginning from a depressing end came from a deep internal motivation to do something better with my life. A deep, inner drive to be happier, live healthier, be more, act on my values and beliefs. It’s what got me started, and what keeps me going to maintain a healthy lifestyle, and not completely fall back into “pre-weight-loss” habits for good.

However… there are plenty of periods when that internal drive fails me. It’s just not enough! Yes, I want to “be healthy”… I want to be happy…. But in moments of weakness and frustration, “be healthy” just isn’t inspiring enough. “Be happy”…? Well, one dozen chocolate chip cookies can fill that need right now!

There are times when internal motivation is just too immeasurable. It’s not immediate, it doesn’t give me the here-and-now jolt that I need to stick to my resolutions.

 And you know what? That is totally okay.

Recognizing that internal motivation may not always be enough force to get you moving does not mean it doesn’t exist. I think to some degree, internal motivation is present in all of us. Who among us doesn’t long to be healthy and happy? I’d venture to guess everyone longs for those things – and those are internal desires.

 But internal motivation can be silent some days. Sometimes for long periods of time. And when we lack the strength to rise up from a deep will, it’s time to turn externally.

I think a part of me – and perhaps some of you – has thought that “external motivation” like rewards, or a specific date/event, or physical feat or accomplishment is somehow inferior to that pure internal driving will. But I’m here to say that depending on where you are in your journey and life, both internal and external drive are needed and equally valuable!

 After that initial spark in my journey to a healthier body and mind, the internal inspiration quickly waned. I found that working out was HARD… it wasn’t immediately rewarding, and I hurt and wanted to quit. Counting my calories… that sucked too! It took so much willpower and self-control, I wanted to give that up! So what kept me going through that?

 External rewards. Measurable progress. Specific dates, events, dresses, and physical challenges.

 I set up rewards for pounds lost, for weeks of consistent exercise, for meeting my calorie goals. I scheduled races to train for, bought a dress in a size too small and hung it on my door. I planned a vacation for 8 months down the line, and set my mind on wearing a two-piece swimsuit with confidence. I committed to these external forces to help push me through to my ultimate goal of getting healthy and being happier.

So often in our journeys we ebb and flow through motivation. I know that once I reached my initial goals, and passed those external motivations, I eased back into an internal source of motivation to keep going. I couldn’t stay focused on pounds or rewards, or I would have withered away, and depleted my bank account buying goodies for myself! It was a new identity as a healthy and fit person that kept me going forward with these new habits.

Yet here I am today, three and half years since meeting my first goals, and I’m back to external motivation. The past few months have been awfully crazy, and had me focusing in other areas of my life more than on my own physical and mental health. As life has it, this happens and is totally normal. What’s also normal, though not desirable, is gaining a few pounds every now and again.

Well, I gained a few pounds this winter. Approximately 6 pounds, to be honest. (It’s hibernation weight, right? Blasted cold outside, getting antsy inside.)

I recognize this reality as my needed kick-in-the-rear to get back into prioritizing my health. I’ve not been ridiculously off track, and I still eat a vegan diet (mostly whole foods, but some occasional convenience foods and too much sugar…). But that doesn’t mean I don’t have room for improvement.

It’s back to the wellness center for me. Back to early morning workouts, and juicing. I’ve been food journaling and keeping honest with myself about what I’m putting into my mouth. I have also set a few specific external rewards and motivations for the coming months.

My biggest external motivation is the Mrs. International Pageant, taking place at the end of July. Though the pageant does not include a swimsuit contest (thank goodness), it does have a fitness wear segment. The fitness attire is two-piece, with a sports bra top, and spandex shorts. This thought alone is terrifying enough to get me motivated to work out more consistently, and pause before shoveling in loads of cookies and chocolate. I also purchased my evening gown for the event, and admittedly – it’s a little snug in my hips. I would like to feel radiantly confident in how I look and feel on stage by then, so that thought (along with the sight of my beautiful gown hanging in my office) is keeping me excited about challenging myself again.

The internal motivation to live and stay healthy and happy is still present, though hasn’t been enough lately to keep me reassessing my behaviors. It’s time to turn outward – and keep moving forward.

Whether it is from within or from without, motivation is a beautiful tool to keep you pressing onward. I challenge you today to determine what is the best way to get you moving whatever direction you need, and to not discriminate if that motivation looks like a new pair of shoes in two months, or perhaps a beautiful dress. 

And as always – it comes down to choice. You direct your future success or failures by what you do today. If you’re lacking motivation of any kind, feel free to read this old blog of mine about just that.

Sometimes, it comes down to no motivation at all. Just a choice – right now.

What to do when your partner or family eat differently

 

Over three years ago, I started transitioning to a healthier diet and lifestyle. This was my choice–  it wasn’t a decision made in tandem with Paul. I told him things were changing, and I was going to start cooking healthier meals, and then I did. Thankfully, Paul was quite supportive and went along with the flow as I flopped through some pretty mediocre meals to start. But gradually, as my confidence grew in the kitchen, my cooking improved, and Paul had very few complaints. Occasionally, he would buy some junk food I didn’t want in the house, or make brownies when I did NOT want them around, but overall he was really supportive.

Things were a little trickier when I made the shift to a vegetarian diet. We had some pretty heart-to-heart conversations about what it would mean in our home, and though it was hard initially, things got easier with time and practice. Again, it was a transition time with food, trying lots of new types of meals and omitting the old basics. Now, having transitioned yet again to a vegan diet, Paul has been on board with the changes. Although he does not consider himself vegan and will still occasionally eat animal products, he does primarily eat plant-based and has no problem with it in the home.

That being said, it was a lot about communication, honesty, compromise, assertion, and willingness to respect each other through the process. It wasn’t just a “snap of the fingers” and everything is easy peasy. 

Any change you make in diet or lifestyle is going to affect your loved ones. Spouse, partner, children, and even extended family will notice a difference in you — both in what you’re physically choosing to put into your body and how you THINK. (The “how you think” change is, I’d say, the most challenging for others to adapt to.) Like it or not, there will be challenges associated with the change, particularly if you are lacking the support from those with whom you live. Since every relationship and family dynamic is unique, there is no “one size fits all” nugget of advice that works across the board in dealing with this challenge. But today, I wanted to offer a few thoughts on how to deal with differing views on diet in your household.

Today’s vlog topic comes from Jackie, who asked, “How do you create balance in a home where you have different eating preferences?”

Thanks for the question, Jackie! I hope this vlog is helpful.

How do YOU personally work to create balance when your family isn’t so keen on changing? Do you have any additional words of wisdom to share? Please do so below!

What should I talk about next week? Pick my brain! Comment below.

How to Break a Coffee Addiction (Vlog)

 

If you’re like most other Americans, you may enjoy a certain beverage every morning as a daily “pick-me-up.” The ol’ cuppa Joe. 

I’m not exempt from the majority on this one. I LOVE my coffee, and enjoy it in many ways: just black, espresso, Americano, cappuccino, latte, sweetened, unsweetened, creamer, spices, and even iced.

Yes, I enjoy coffee.

But I don’t enjoy it every single day. And I’m not addicted anymore!

At the early part of last year, I used to think I wasn’t addicted but just LIKED my coffee and could quit anytime. After going cold-turkey for a bit, subbing green tea even, I had the most brain-splitting headaches and was super tired and crabby. Ha! NOT addicted? I was totally kidding myself there.

Since breaking the addiction, I still enjoy my coffee a few times per week, but don’t feel horrible without it. (I do feel like I can FLYYYYYY when I drink it, though! LOL.) Over the past year, I have found several things helpful in replacing this addiction with healthier and happier habits. 

I hope you find this video helpful if you’re a coffee addict! 

Here is a link to the brewed cocoa I mentioned: http://www.criobru.com

What topic should I talk about next week? Share your thoughts and questions below, and I may choose your topic to discuss in the future!

 

First Video Blog (Vlog) – Health Coaching Principles

 

Greetings, friends!

Today, I got a wild hair and decided to try something new (well, newish for me): a video blog! I used to post an occasional vlog on SparkPeople when I was blogging regularly there, and would now like to get back in a routine of doing vlogs and blogs here on my own website. Sometimes it’s just better to hear things face-to-face, ya know?

My hope with these vlogs is to help generate conversation, and give you an opportunity to ask questions and possibly get them answered by me! I work on lots of different concepts with my clients, and would love to give you a little glimpse of what it would be like to work with me as a client.

In today’s vlog, I talk about my guiding principles in health coaching — the basic philosophies I have while working with clients toward healthy lifestyle changes. I hope you find it interesting, and that it gives you a better insight into what health coaching entails.

I would love to hear your thoughts, feedback, and questions in my comments below! Do you agree with my principles? 

What would you like me to talk about next week? Any burning questions you’d like me to share my thoughts on? Ask away, and I’ll choose one to answer in my next vlog!

Favorite Fridge Foods: Staples for My Healthy Kitchen

 

A couple days ago, I posted a question on facebook about what you might like to read on this blog. Many of you seemed interested in reading about my favorite foods and kitchen staples, and since a kitchen and pantry stocked with healthy items is key to living and eating well, I thought it would be a good topic to cover.

When working with clients on healthy changes in their nutrition habits, I am often surprised (even though I shouldn’t be) by what foods people have not tried and do not use on a daily basis — foods that I consider pretty “common” in my life, and that I utilize all the time. It is easy to forget that only a few short years ago, this “normal” of mine was completely different, and I would have written a staples list that looked something like this: pasta, cereal, bread, cow’s milk, Chef Boyardee, Kraft Mac N Cheese boxes, hamburger, chicken breasts, creamed soups, cheetos, lunch meat, cheese, and a family size gallon of ice cream (chocolate chip). 

YIKES!

While I do still admittedly stock pastas, some cereal (mainly for my husband, the Cereal Eater), and sometimes bread (fresh baked whole grain, or Ezekiel – frozen), the rest of my list has changed dramatically over the past few years. I rarely shop in the middle of the grocery store, and when I do, it’s generally for something which I can’t find an organic or health-market version. 

When I’m introducing new clients to healthy foods, or walking them through a pantry raid (buh-bye Cheez-Its!) or a grocery shopping tour, I will often give them a list of my pantry and kitchen staples. This list is categorized by type and section of my kitchen (pantry, baking goods, vegetables, condiments, etc), and covers pretty much everything I could think of that I routinely stock. 

Since I don’t want to lose your attention, I’m going to break down just a FEW of my staples into a couple blogs to give you an idea of the kinds of things I routinely turn to in my cooking and eating on a regular basis! This blog will cover a few favorite items from my fridge (fruits, veggies, etc). Please excuse my first item from qualifying in the “fridge” list, but it couples well with the fruits/veggies. ;-)

Favorite Fridge Foods

Bananas

Okay, so I don’t store bananas in my FRIDGE, but I figured I’d include them with other fruits and veggies I always keep on hand in this list. I always have bananas in my kitchen. I will often intentionally buy the brown/spotted ones, or wait until they get really ripe at home, then peel and break them in half to store in a bag in my freezer. Always always always have frozen bananas. It’s great for emergency “banana ice cream,” adding great texture and natural sweetness to smoothies, and coining and dipping in chocolate shell (mmmm). For a fun snack idea, slice a fresh banana lengthwise  and spread with almond or peanut butter and a few chocolate chips. Banana split!

apples_orangesApples & Oranges

Pretty standard fruits, but I always have them as well. They’re easy grab-n-go snacks, and have a long life in the fridge! I use oranges a lot in my juices, and love apple slices sprinkled with cinnamon and dipped in peanut or almond butter for a snack. Peel and chop up an orange and throw it in a raw kale salad for a delightful citrus flavor with a strong green.

Kale

Kale is my all-time favorite green vegetable! I almost always have kale on hand… and if I don’t, it’s because I’ve just eaten it all up and need to buy some soon! I put kale in everything from smoothies, raw salads, on top of pizza, stuffed in wraps, thrown in stir fries, torn into soups, and as a big steamed or sautéed pile on my plate. Kale chips are also a favorite snack of mine!

Spinach & Romaine

Spinach_SaladThese are pretty standard greens in my fridge. Believe it or not, I don’t use them primarily for salads (although yes, I do make delicious salads with them, too – like the one in this picture)! Primarily, I use both these greens in smoothies and juicing (spinach more for smoothies, romaine for juices). They’re so light and fresh and leave me feeling fan-freaking-tastic every time.

 

Unsweetened Original Almond Milk

This is my go-to milk. I use it in everything! Smoothies, gravies, baked goods, shakes, dressings, soups, and just as a cold glass with a cookie! I love how creamy almond milk is as compared to other milks, and the store-brand (HyVee) around here is only $2.49/half gallon. Compare that to $4.99/half gallon for “good quality” (organic, hormone-free, “grass fed”) cow’s milk, and it’s a considerable savings. Sometimes, I freeze almond milk in ice cube trays and then use for blending up deliciously thick and creamy shakes – combine with some silken tofu and you have a thick “Frosty” treat.

almond_milkI have tried other nondairy milks — like soy, rice, hemp, coconut “beverage”, and oat  — and like the texture and taste of almond best. Soy has a slightly sweet flavor (even unsweetened), and should be used moderately, rice milk is kind of watery but has a mild taste, hemp milk is thick and creamy but very expensive, coconut milk “beverage” (the kind in the carton) is very coconutty and thinner than almond milk, and oat definitely has a strong OAT taste, which may not be great in all dishes. Almond wins my vote. :)

Natural Peanut Butter & Almond Butter

I use nut butters in smoothies, on whole grain toast, swirled into oatmeal, in baked goods, blended into dressings/sauces, as a dip for fruits and veggies (apples, carrots, and celery are common for me), and of course by the spoonful. If you’ve never tried almond butter, you seriously need to go buy some (or make some) immediately. Seriously. Go. Now. ;) 

Nuts & Seeds (stored in the freezer)

Nuts_seedsKeep raw nuts and seeds fresh by storing in the fridge or freezer — the Omega fatty acids in nuts go rancid on the shelf after a few months, so its important to keep them cold in airtight containers and they will last for upwards of a few years! I always have these raw nuts and seeds on hand for baking, cooking, and snacking: walnuts, almonds, pecans, cashews, brazil nuts, sunflower seeds, pumpkin seeds, flaxseed, hemp seeds, and sesame seeds. When I first starting cooking and baking more plant-based, I didn’t have this variety in my kitchen all the time! So, it seemed like an uncomfortable (and expensive) shift to start stocking these regularly. However, now that they are “staples” in my kitchen, I use them often and buy intermittently, so the price doesn’t seem as shocking all at once. 

 

I know it can seem overwhelming trying to transition to a healthy kitchen and pantry all at once, so make changes as you can, with foods that you enjoy. Try new recipes each week that may utilize foods or ingredients you don’t typically stock, and then set a challenge to use those unfamiliar foods or ingredients in another way later on that week or next! These items would not have become staples in my life if I only depended on them for the occasional recipe that calls for it. Familiarize yourself with fresh foods, and get creative. 

After all, if you have healthy foods on hand (and DON’T have the crap food — like Cheetos or cream-of-mystery-stuff soups) then you won’t turn to the old patterns for comfort and ease. You’ll have to eat the good stuff, or it goes to waste (which really pisses me off when I waste food, so it’s a good motivator to eat it!). 

Watch and subscribe for my next post which will continue the theme of this one — Favorite Pantry Foods! You’ll get some insight into the things I regularly keep on hand to throw together healthful meals and snacks on a regular basis.

What are you favorite fridge foods? Do you share any of mine? Share your thoughts below!

 

What I “Really” Look Like: Healthy Body in Unflattering & Flattering Photos

I am a beautiful woman.

I say this not to sound arrogant or narcissistic, but to point out a reality that I often struggle to acknowledge and accept with humility. I am beautiful, and so are you.

We as women have such deeply rooted self-esteem battles, that are ever aggravated in the bombarding of daily media we face. We’re constantly measuring ourselves against the woman next to us, the face on the magazine cover, the girl in the commercial, the blogger, the facebook friend whose Instagramed “selfies” are filtered over unrecognizably. There is no shortage of ways to fall short in the measures of beauty we hold ourselves to. It’s obscene, really.

And it’s bull. It’s utterly insane, self-degrading and abusive, and makes no sense at all. How can we live a life of health and happiness if we are constantly beating ourselves down? Constantly comparing ourselves to the appearance and standards of others? There is no safety or self-esteem in a life like this. Only self-hatred and a constant feeling of lack.

I’ve been struggling with this on and off for my whole life – much like you have, I’d guess. When I decided to embark on a journey toward a more fit body and mind, I knew that losing weight wouldn’t solve all my problems. (And it didn’t.) Sure, I felt better in a healthier, smaller and stronger body, but the mental hurdles I faced still kept me cycling in and out of self-abuse and talk. I’d look in the mirror and ONLY see the cellulite. I’d scour magazines for health tips and beauty tips and the best workout to “tone my abs.” It didn’t matter that my weight was healthy, my body strong and capable, or that my husband adores me—only that no matter how hard I tried, I could never get those six-pack abs, that cellulite-free butt or that tiny waist. I could try on a pair of size four jeans in one store—and feel like I was on top of the world!—then go to the next and barely squeeze into a “juniors” (ha!) size 11, and then feel like I was fat and gross.

Admittedly, I sometimes still have these feelings. I have low-self esteem days here and there, and wonder if I’ll ever just be OK and happy in my skin.

But those days are few. And I am proud to say that MOST days, I truly do believe I am beautiful and don’t need to measure up to any of the other women I see. Because I’m me, and I’m healthy and worthy and good as I am.

I’ve had these thoughts on my mind a lot in the past few days since I read this very inspiring blog post by Fit Mama Training. Check it out here: fitmamatraining.com/what-i-really-look-like-a-perfectly-healthy-body-in-more-and-less-flattering-photos/

She posts a chain of photos of her real, beautiful and healthy body in some unflattering and flattering angles. It was so inspiring to read her words of confidence and truth – I felt the desire to do the same.

So, my friends, today I share with you some real photos of my healthy body, in more and less flattering angles. They’re not filtered or edited, just real unprofessional quick shots from today.

We start this morning… post-shower, wet hair and no makeup. I have a few blemishes, and usually do. I’ve always struggled with feeling ugly whenever I get breakouts (which has been almost always, from about age 12 to 25), and I’m trying to be more gentle with myself and not “attack” my skin at night (since abusing it by picking only makes it angrier and worse!).

Torso shot… not flexing, not slouching… just standing. I don’t have a “perfectly toned core” and no matter how thin I’ve gotten in the past, I can’t get definition or much for a defined waist. It’s just how my body is shaped and that’s okay. I can “pinch an inch” around my hips and tummy. I also have stretch marks on my hips and thighs and butt, and I have tiny breasts. All these things are okay, and don’t make me less beautiful.

Here is a more flattering angle, in my yoga booty-shorts and sports bra. I weighed myself after breakfast and workout today, and I’m around 150 pounds (5’10”). This is on the high side of maintenance for me, but it’s easy to fluctuate between 147-151 without effort. When I try to keep my weight between 143-145, it takes more effort—careful eating and more rigorous exercise. For the few pounds difference, no one notices but me. And I don’t care that much anymore.

Squattin’! Leg muscle definition, strong booty. 

More flattering angle. Sucked in, flexed tummy. Not much definition, but lots of muscle!

Less flattering angle. Different lighting, slumping down, pooching out over shorts. Baby-love handles and soft pooch. Still okay.

Less flattering angle. Slumpy slouchy. Intentionally pooching out belly and hunching over. Not so cute? Still okay.

GROSS FACE! Slumpy hunchy. Rippled “belly fat.” 

Pulled the shorts waistline down a bit, and I can REALLY stick out the belly. Looks like I could lose a little fat here, doesn’t it? Could make a good “before / after” photo, even just compared to some of the more flattering pics above!

Booty-shot. Not perfectly toned. I have cellulite. That’s okay. This booty can squat, balance in yoga poses and run me far!

More flattering shot, differently lighting. Flexing abs.

Difficult behind-the-head-mirror-back shot. I have muscle back there.

All dressed up and made-up! Normal day look for me. Flattering lighting and angle.

Unflattering face. Double chin!

Big grin! Less cute angle, but real me. I have little wrinkles and blemishes.

Different lighting, different look. Still okay!

Full body shot, all dressed up and accessorized.

That’s me, folks. Lots of angles, lots of realness. And I’m beautiful, and so are you.

My hope in sharing these photos and thoughts is not to give myself an ego-boost. I don’t need that from you, as I’m learning to boost myself in a healthy way each day. I’m hoping to give YOU a shot of confidence, knowing that you are gorgeous and worthy, with or without a filter or photoshop. Don’t compare yourself to me, because you’re NOT me. Ya get what I’m saying?

You are uniquely and perfectly YOU. And that’s enough. Because you’re enough.

Stop all the comparison. Stop trying to make your body like someone else’s. Stop the “fitspiration” pages collecting photos of people with totally different genetic makeup than you. You won’t look like them, even following their workouts and diet plans!

Today, I challenge you to see through the judgment, through the comparison, and the unflattering angles. See that you ARE enough, you ARE beautiful, and you CAN be healthy and happy in your skin.

Be beautiful. Be you!

If you’d like some support along the way, making a shift to a happier and healthier internal and external YOU, please let me know. Powerful change can happen over the course of a few months with the right support and steps to make it happen. Be well, my beautiful friends!

Will You Be Your Valentine?

During the week of flowers, chocolates, stuffed animals, and incessant advertising by jewelry companies, I thought it might be an appropriate time to sit back and consider what this holiday of love means outside of commercial pressures. Sure, it’s a blatant opportunity to remind those in our life that we love and care for them, and a glaring day of loneliness to those who may feel unloved without a romantic partner… but isn’t it more? Can’t it be more?

I think it should be. And is. And so is every day. It’s an opportunity to truly turn inward and showourselves the love and care we need and deserve.

Have you ever hated yourself? Or, if not hated, perhaps berated? Chastised, verbally or mentally abused, physically abused through harm or guilty, angry eating? I know I have.

I know I’ve done a poor job of actually treating myself with the same love and respect I treat others. I have been a poor friend to me, been abusive and degrading, and really loathed my very existence on occasions. I’ve felt unlovable, beaten down inside, and unworthy of happiness. I thought that if I punished myself enough for my failures and ineptitudes it would somehow motivate me to improve, to suck less, to be a better person.

What I’ve learned over the last several years is that hating myself and dishonoring my body and mind has done no good at all. In fact, it’s only held me back, and made bumps in the road feel like mountains. When I started to honor myself, to love and nurture and pamper the internal and external me, I realized I could be a better person. I felt worthy. I felt like I was competent and resilient, and that I DO deserve happiness.

I have been thinking a lot about these things lately, particularly after I was feeling overwhelmed and overstretched with my to-do list, and posted a facebook status wondering how parents handle it all with children. I immediately got a whole chain of responses by parents saying things similar to “your children become your life” and that it’s all about “putting yourself second to them.” When I expressed my understanding that yes, children do become and ARE a main priority, but I think it’s important to balance the self in a life with children, I felt immediately “mommy-shamed” (and I’m not even a mom yet!), as if my admittance that self-love is still important somehow made me a selfish person and unfit to be a good parent.

Something occurred to me when I was pondering this interaction and social norm – self-sacrifice for the good of others: Loving yourself less does not mean you can therefore love others more. You do not better the world or others around you – be they your children or strangers in another continent – by self-sacrificing, self-deprecating, and self-abusing. Love is not a tangible thing (like money), where you give less to yourself and you have more to give to others. Love is endless, intangible, ever expanding and conceiving. The more you give, the more you have.

And the more you honor and love yourself, the better person you can be to others.You will feel valuable. You’ll feel honored and respected. And when you feel that way, you want others to feel it too. So you share of yourself, your time, your possessions, and love.

Now, I’m not saying that you should love your children less or love others less – I hope that’s clear. And I’m certainly not saying that you should put your “beauty rest” or personal pampering wants before the immediate needs of a baby’s diaper changing or tending to hungry children (i.e. being a responsible and loving parent). But what I am saying is that there is a way to keep self-love in our lives without it being selfishness. These things are not the same at all.

Self-love is about honor and respect of life. It’s about seeing God within you – precious and good – and allowing that light to shine forth to others. It’s about modeling a behavior of treating your SELF the way you want others to treat you, and you want to treat others!

Selfishness is about denying others and seeing no value outside the self. It’s a callous armor of cowardice, a refusal to open and be vulnerable or share with others. It is not love, and it disrespects the value of others in your life.

Can you see how these things are sooooooo not the same thing?

When you make a practice of including time and activities in your life that honor your talents and interests, and nurture both your body and soul, you can truly be a better person/parent/sibling/friend/etc. You earn no medallions and save no lives by disrespecting and belittling your self and your own worth in your life.

So, I ask you this today: Will you be your own ValentineHow can you choose to honor and love yourself in a way that makes you a better parent, and a happier, more conscious person? What gift will you give yourself this week—and next week, and the week after –to renew the love you have for you? For many of my clients, even a simple 30 minutes set aside for a bubble bath or a designated activity they enjoy just for them can be the perfect way to nourish and refresh the body, mind, and soul.

I would love to hear what you’re going to do this week as your act of self-love and care. Please comment below, or share on facebook or in an email. You are worthy of love. Even by you.